I thought it would be fun to do a talent show with the kids. I had promised them all summer to do one. I figured the last evening would be perfect, haha. Addie and Bray showed us their wonderful ballet technique, Tay showed off her cheers, Zee played his recorder that he has practiced the entire summer (...) and Tigs spent the entire time bugging the performer, trying to stick his little fingers into the fan or just screaming :-)
All during the summer when we got home from the gym Tay would run upstairs and put her "exercise clothes" on and run around the backyard for 30 or so minutes. She has been begging me to take her running for years and I think she got tired of waiting and decided to take it into her own hands :-) She has even got Addie out there running a few times. Bray and Zee say they would rather watch TV then exercise (oops!). I guess a little bit of my Mom has rubbed off on Tatum - she is a health fanatic.
This year we were able to attend the Angel Walk sponsored by Angel Eyes (Formerly the Colorado SIDS Program). It was such a blessing to have my kids, husband, parents and uncle there to celebrate our beautiful baby! We started out by decorating our T-Shirts., writing letters/names on footprints and decorating the sidewalk with our angel's name.
The walk started by doing a tree dedication. This program plants a new tree every year in honor of these beautiful babies. Each family got to help place dirt around the tree when their child's name was announced. After the tree the walk began. As you walk around the beautiful lake you look for your child's name, as well as notice all the other babies names. Beckett's name happened to be towards the very end, I was freaking out that they might have forgotten his...but they didn't :-)
They provide activities for all the families and children. There were jumping castles, face painting, balloons, water fight, playground, etc. It was a lot of fun to be there in honor of Beckett...remember him and the meaning of his short but wonderful life. I am always sad to see so many families living this nightmare but there is always comfort in meeting others in your circumstance that understands what we have experienced over the past 2 years.
Looking at these pictures was actually harder than being there for some reason. I was concentrated on helping our new friends who lost their darling daughter this past May, I think I was not emotionally connected to what I was there doing. And I wouldn't have had it any other way - I want to be there to help other families through this tragedy because you just feel so lost and vulnerable for months and months - and I am glad to be a support and/or shoulder to cry on. When I came home and started to look through the photos it was heart wrenching - I miss him way too much. It just never gets any easier.
I hate that these wonderful families are part of this "club." All of them have become like family. It makes me horribly sad how they have to miss out on so much with their child. Some...it has been years...others a few months...but everyone misses and loves their baby just the same.
LOVE YOU GUYS - SO BLESSED THAT I HAVE GOTTEN TO KNOW AND LOVE YOUR BABY AND YOUR FAMILY. MAY PEACE AND COMFORT BE WITH YOU. THANK YOU FOR BEING APART OF JED AND MINE HEALING OVER THE PAST 2 YEARS <3
I'm so deeply sorry that your hearts are broken.
FOR THE FRIENDS THAT MISSED THE WALK - WE THOUGHT OF YOU AND YOUR BABY...LOVE TO YOU AS WELL!
"Gone Too Soon"
Today could have been the day,
That you blow out your candles,
Make a wish as you close your eyes.
Today could have been the day,
Everybody was laughing,
Instead I just sit here and cry,
Who would you be?
What would you look like,
When you looked at me for the very first time?
Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life.
Not a day goes by,
That I don't think of you,
I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,
Such a ray of light we never knew,
Gone too soon, yeah.
Would you have been president
Or a painter, an author, or sing like your mother?
One thing is evident,
Would've given all I had,
Would've loved you like no other.
Who would you be,
What would you look like,
Would you have my smile and her eyes?
Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life.
Not a day goes by,
That I don't think of you,
I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,
Such a ray of light we never knew,
Gone too soon, yeah.
This year we had our annual End of Summer Party in our backyard. The kids each got to invite a couple of friends to spend the afternoon with playing with water, paint, play-dough and, of course, eating some treats!
